In her viral TED talk “The Gift and Power of Emotional Courage,” Dr. Susan David shared on of my favorite quotes, “Discomfort is the price of admission to a meaningful life.” When asked about the most pervasive theme in my work, without hesitation I say it is our growing tendency to avoid that which makes us uncomfortable.
There is a trend in our society which is emblematic of this Comfort Trap; fewer and fewer 16-year-olds seize the opportunity to get their driver’s licenses. While there are several reasons why many may wait, the most persistent reported reason is fear: fear of failure, failure of making mistakes, fear of the unknown. Figuratively and quite literally, this avoidant response to fear shrinks the world of the developing teen.
Fear-based avoidance and remaining in one’s comfort zone deprives an individual of opportunities to be challenged, to learn, and to grow. This fear and avoidance pattern reverberates around our playing fields, classrooms, and workplaces and consequently prevents individuals and teams from reaching their full potential.
Knowing that seeking comfort and convenience creates stagnation and stalls personal growth, we must, as Michael Easter writes in his book, The Comfort Crisis, “embrace discomfort as a powerful catalyst for change and self-discovery.” In fact, perceiving moments of stress as readiness, care, or excitement, can improve our performance! After all, fear is evolution’s most powerful performance enhancer.
In publishing this first blog post, I am choosing to interpret my fear, worry, and nervousness regarding sharing these insights in this public setting as excitement and a sign that I truly care about this work. Moreover, I believe that good questions are more valuable than good answers. With that in mind, I will conclude each post with what I hope will prove to be thought-provoking questions.
When have you allowed fear to inhibit you from taking action?
Looking back, what might you have done differently?
What uncomfortable experiences are you pursuing to create a more meaningful life?
Certainly, this piece was written to challenge your thinking and encourage positive change. I hope you enjoy this post and the others that will follow, but in the end, I am proud knowing that in writing this I have chosen courage over comfort, meaning-making over safety, and vulnerability over shame.